For this chapter in our family Chronicle I do want to demonstrate things which I have learned throughout the last several years; however, I will not express the qualities, attributes, or talents that I believe that I have acquired; I think that would be boasting, and we are commandment not to boast in our own strength, but to glorify God for that of which he has given us including our talents, qualities, attributes, families, homes, and food. So instead, I wish to elaborate on the beautiful words which have brought peace into my home and heart this past year or so. First I want to exemplify the wisdom I have gained from President James E Faust address in the April 2007 General Conference. The Focus on his talk was about Forgiveness. Forgiveness is one of the Godly attributes that I have struggled with immensely, in the past. I have always held grudges toward family members and friends for what I believed were unjustified acts. I would hold in anger for the “faults” they had and the “wrongdoings” that they have done towards me. My anger hindered my spiritual growth and development from becoming a more Christ like saint. I was so focused on revenge and making sure that the offender got justice promptly that, I had no time to forgive and love them for their faults, and realizing that they too are sinners just as I am, striving to seek forgiveness from their Heavenly Father. It was not until I heard James E Faust’s address that I realized that I am required to forgive all men their trespasses, so that in return I am forgiving for my ungodly deeds. We are taught in our church that if we want Heavenly to forgive our trespasses than we too need to forgive others trespasses against us. Certain principles of the gospel are easier for me to adapt to the teachings quickly and make a change within my actions or deeds, and others take revelation for a particular change in my behavior to change. This is where President James E Faust address comes into play in my change of attitude and behavior regarding forgiveness. In his address, President Faust gives the example of forgiving those who have offended you through love. Moving on, he declares; from hurt feelings enable the atonement of Christ to work miracles in our lives, so that we are able to continue in the healing process. I have been hurt several times in my life, just as I am sure many of you have been. I have been through a divorce, which has caused much anguish and resentment. I have made some unmoral choices in my life, which have caused me to be unforgiving to myself, and I have had some of my children say some really mean things that have taken me much time to “LET GO.” I know it is easier said than done but, forgiveness is a requirement to love and enter the kingdom of God. Without forgiveness there would be no atonement, for there would be no mercy, because there would be no love. But God does love us therefore there is hope, forgiveness and love. God in his infinite power has freed us from the band of spiritual and physical death, because he had in him the power to forgive all men their trespasses against him. In the scriptures we learn that we are to emulate the savior’s example “Therefore, what manner of men ought ye to be? Verily I say unto you, even as I am” (3 Nephi 27:27). Christ was the perfect example of forgiveness. He taught us much about forgiving those who trespass against us when he showed his compassion towards Judas Iscariot for betraying him for 30 pieces of silver. As declared by the apostle Jeffery R Holland in our time “Never in the history of this world has so little money purchased so much infamy. We are not the ones to judge Judas’s fate, but Jesus said of His betrayer, “Good [were it] for that man if he had not been born” (179th General Conference April 2009). Just as the apostle Jeffery R Holland stated, we are not the ones to judge Judas’s fate; however, I can feel the saviors compassion for Judas when he states, “Good were it for this man if he had not been born.” I delight in the comfort of knowing my savior personally and the love that surrounds him for all of his creations, including and especially humankind. Another example that the savior demonstrates, on this very same night that he was betrayed by Judas is, his love and forgiveness for Peter, the apostle who denied the savior “thrice before the cock crowed.” It is noted in the scriptures many times over that Peter had many mortal weaknesses, but he also denotes that “he overcame them by his faith in Jesus Christ. The lord Honored Peter by selecting him to hold the keys of the kingdom on earth… It was through Peter’s ministry that the gospel was opened up to the gentiles” (King James Bible Dictionary). There are numerous accounts within the Holy Scriptures that testifies of God’s unconditional love and forgiveness that he has towards his people. I am indeed very grateful for a father in heaven who was willing to sacrifice his only begotten to give us sinners a fighting chance to come back into his presence. I have a testimony of the divine power of forgiveness and the peace that comes through “letting go and letting god” work miracles so that we may become more like him and his son. Turning now to an example in our era, James E Faust demonstrates the love and concern from a group of Amish people toward a widow and her children, when the husband allegedly went into the Amish community and shot and killed 5 Amish girls and bonded the other 5 girls so that they could not move. Even in this time turmoil, the Amish community reached out their hand to the widowed wife and her children because they too believed that they were victims just as much as the families of those girls who were shot and killed. They extended their love and concern by sending flowers, cards, and monies for them to get through this difficult time. There was no anger or frustration among them, just forgiveness. This example has given me a testimony that I will be able to share throughout my life to family, friends, and those who desire to learn about the gospel.
Another gospel principle that I have learned throughout this year is from the apostle Jeffery R Holland’s book “Broken Things to Mend.” I have had many relationships to mend in this life, due to my imperfection in forgiving others. When reading chapter 3 in this book, I was able to gain a more proud understanding of Heavenly Father’s role as a father to me and my role as a mother to my children. Previously to reading this book, I had often punished my children out of anger for some misdeed that they have done, instead of punishing them out of love. As stated In 2 Corinthians 6 we are to teach “By pureness, by knowledge, by longsuffering, by kindness, by the Holy Ghost, by love unfeigned.” I will be the first to admit that I was and still am not the greatest parent on this earth, but with the help with literature like that of Holland’s book, helps me to improve upon the skills necessary for becoming an eternal mother. When my children were smaller, than they are now, I had such a hard time being a mother. In my case I was a mother from the time I was 17years old. It troubled me to be a mother, because I did not have any time to be a young adult let alone a mother. I knew not the first thing of being a mother, all I knew was that it was a blessing. But having a 3 month old baby crying several times out of the day to be changed, feed, or rocked to sleep does not seem like a blessing at first. I grew to become impatient with them very fast, and my punishments were very stern, too strong most of the time. But once I became a member, I was able to receive additional help from the lord which lightened my burden immensely. One of the most influential and beneficial words to live by is these “If you try your best to be the best parent you can be, you will have done all that a human being can do and all that God expects you to do” (Broken Things to Mend, 28). I changed my tactics as time went on and I was able to express how I felt about their choices and how their choices have consequences, without spanking them or doing some ungodly punishment that would seem too many as abuse. As I grew in spirituality, I grew in my role as a parent. All the broken relationships that came with anger and frustration began to heal, and we were coming quite acquainted with one another. I enjoy my family; we have much fun with one another. But we had to mend many bruises and scars that we left in each others hearts. I was able to start the healing process with two fundamental truths found in Holland and Faust’s talks. First faith, then healing, are both the basic necessities that has helped my family begin the healing process and continue to strive to love and respect one another.
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